Short but sweet. Or not so sweet.

A quick update.

I am hoping that some of you might have a chance and be willing to go here and support my efforts to fight breast cancer in honor of my Aunt Kaye McDonnell - who has been fighting breast cancer for several years. My Aunt Kaye is an inspiring, funny, tough New England native with a rasp of a voice, a penchant for collecting animals at her Maine Farmhouse, and a job as a victim witness advocate with the state. She is soulful and gentle and strong at once. She means the world to me. I walk in her honor!

Please help today!

I have come to realize over the past few weeks that I am compulsively fickle. A true mess of confusion - never really knowing what I want at all. There are a few parts of my life that aren't like that - a few parts that make me feel solid and sturdy and sure. But mostly - I'm fickle and flighty. Not exactly a bonus for organizations, companies, hobbies, and sometimes (but not all that often) people with whom I associate.

Had my endo appointment today... Here's how it breaks down.

Weight - Gained 2 lbs since January. This does not make ANY sense. I have cut calories and have been exercising faithfully. But there it is.

Unfortunately, my endo forgot to order my thyroid test - which might explain this nonsensical weight gain. We set it up for next time though.

A1C - 6.0 - Not too shabby, but higher than my last A1C of 5.8 - I attribute the slight rise to cutting out more lows. Which is a good thing.

LDL - Still not under 100 (just over at 105) but this is better than 149, where I was before. I still need work. Hopefully, continual exercise, medication, and my healthier diet will rein it in some more. I am also going to start on Fish Oil caplets. I wish I could take a statin. But I can't tolerate them at all. So - I battle my genetic make up (two parents, two brothers, and two sets of grandparents all make for a nasty family history of high cholesterol) with less than superior but better than none tools.

Kidney Function - Excellent!

Protein in Urine? "Not even a trace"

Blood Pressure 116/70 - great.

My feet apparently look OK.

In other diabetes news - I am returning my Animas 2020. Honestly, this is a tough decision to have made. I found that the inconveniences really outweighed the advantages of this gadget. I am going to get the Cozmo upgrade - which will give me the food database that I really wanted with the Animas without the things I didn't care for. What are those things, you ask?

The button pushing. In today's world - giving insulin in meetings and around others and trying to do so covertly is made very difficult when the number of buttons that need pushing to accomplish delivery is doubled. Sometimes, I would think I'd finished a task and I hadn't.

The one push bolus canceling thing. When you give a bolus with this machine and then put your pump away immediately, you run the risk of accidentally hitting a button - any button - and canceling the bolus. Weird, they make you confirm everything else with this pump with several button pushes, but canceling insulin delivery only takes on push. Not good. I have canceled boluses and not realized it. Not good.

The lack of software. This pump was supposed to come with software that enhances it. It did not. I cannot get an answer about when I'll have my software. And when I do - I'm wondering if I'll even like it, given how unhappy I am already.

So - I don't want a pump that's going to sit in my closet, waiting for me to use it. Especially since my insurance won't pay for another one for four years.

I think this pump might work for some people - but it wasn't the right fit for me. And this has nothing to do with my being fickle. I think.

That's it for now.

More Later.